what a travesty!

What a shit of a day. Did Stat today... Far out had to wake up at 6.30 and we left the house at 7.15. It was kind of fun seeing people from schoool and stuff, but once I stepped into the hall, I wanted to run home. The test was hard! I bet you my sis did better than me!! Anyway, I got home at 3.00, had chem tutor at 3.30, finshed at 4.15 had 4u tutor at 4.15 and got home at 6.15. It's a travesty I tell you! Oh, and i forgot to mention, I saw an old Macfields friend today, LIZ! hehe Nice very nice. Yajing and I tried catchin up with her after the exam, but we had to go... But it was nice seeing her again!

So, have you guys missed me? I haven't blogged for a while. It's cause I haven't been on and I didn't have anything to blog about. Reason? pfft

I wonder... how can someone just suddenly end things and carry on like nothing just happened? It's a mystery... WAIT! It's not. Simple answer but I'm not going to say what because it's obvious right?

Right, I need to chillax. Oh yeh Happy bday Walid for yesterday. I don't know you that well... but you're very fun to annoy in class. hehe You're a great woman, hope you had a fun bday!!

Alright, 3u test on Monday... Everyone's studying like mad and I haven't even touched my book!! I don't even know what to study! There's no past papers and grrr! But I hope I do well, maybe this time I could get past the fucking stoopid 90% mark? I'm aiming for that, well I've been aiming for that for a very long time and I always end up gett stoopid 88 or 89. That reminds me.... REPORTS! argh *runs around* nah it was alright, my mum's reaction was better than I expected. She didn't lecture me. All she said was... you're doing okay but you did shit in english and 4u so try harder. WTF! What happened to chemistry and physics?! I did worse in those subjects and she didn't even mention it! So wierd, maybe she was expecting me to get low so she didn't say anything. That's alright.... issert? Well, I think she mainly judged my perfomance at school from the interviews. I don't think she looked at my report. Anyway, where is my report? I think it's buried under all the newspapers and shit on my desk. eww

Argh, I got to catch up on Physics and chem. So much work to do... It's so hard to get into the study mode. Everytime I tried to study, I end up sitting there staring at my computer screen (which is off) or staring into space. I swear my desk is so distracting, so much shit on it. Anyways, I give up on 4u homework. Sleep time now.

destinys child - emotions

And where are you now,
now that I need you?
Tears on my pillow wherever you go
I'll cry me a river that leads to your ocean
You'll never see me fall apart

I need a diary. I want to be able to reflect on my emotions and stuff. But I can't have a diary cause my bloody mum would bloody read it. I swear, I don't have any privacy.

I just need a diary.

[edit] mai: i need a diary too! sigh. funny when u try n explain what ur feeling u end up arguing and circumulation occurs. a diary never argues back and understands you. sigh. [/edit]

Letoya- What love can do

I'm losing sleep over you
Look what you've done to me
Not saying you ain't the truth
This love's no fantasy
Sometimes I'm so sick of you
I need some thrapy
Just like an addict on you
Make no recovery

So should I stay,should I go
Do I do,do I don't
Will I , Will i won't
Do like my my mama told me?

That's what love can do
Everythang just ain't good for you
It's got me so confused
Maybe that's just what love can do

See, you sweep me off of my feet
Then bring me down my knees
And then occasionally
I'm like somewhere in between
Everytime we get it right,we go wrong
And tell me why does every fight turn...

Don't worry people, I'm not in love. I've never actually been in love. There was a time when I thought I was and that was the only time I've ever thought I was. Now i think of it, I don't think I was.

What is love anyway?

My legs are about to drop off any minute. We did so much walking today. I never knew Sydney Uni had so many steps. All we did was walk up and down bloody stairs and it killed my feet! It started to rain during our break and we kind of got caught in the rain. I wasn't drenched, I was damp. lol. Anyway, the excursion wasn't that fun. I nearly dozed off in the lecture. My eyes kept closing. I couldn't help it! I had to wake up early and I couldn't sleep last night, so its not my fault! I saw Vincent trying to stay awake, and it fully cracked me up because he was sitting at the front.

Anyway, the day ended wierd. We got to Redfern station, and it was around 3.30. It was lame cause it seemed like we were having an after school excursion! Well, the train we got on went straight to Fairfield, and I didn't know so I got off at Lidcombe with everyone else and realised that the train I just got off was going to Fairfield. But it was too late lol. Well, for the first time ever, I took the train to Fairfield by myself and took the bus home. How exciting is that! It was kind of scary.

Overall, the day was ok. The weather at the moment is mad. I love rain.

Gone!

A piece of me went away today. Forever.

WE SOLD OUR CAR!!! omg! haha. Don't worry, I was referring to my car. lol. Well, the car I've been going to tutor and school with for nearly umm 8 years was taken away from me today. I had special moments with that car. There were times when I hated it, and there were times I loved it. Wait, my love for the car faded away when I reached highschool. lol. Well, I nearly left my keys in there too. I swear I'm such an idiot. I left my keys in one of the pockets, and the car was sold already. But luckily I ran outside the house and jumped in the car and got my keys out. *phew* My dad thought I was running out to say bye to it or something. Like no way. haha

Right now, I'm freezing my ass off. I wasn't going to go online, but I got stuck on some 4unit question, so might as well. My tutor is going to kick my ass to China when he sees my 4unit paper. lol.

Alright, enough of that. My fingers are frozen at the moment and my knees are shaking.

[edit] Why do we have to be so naive sometimes. Why do we believe what we see, what we hear, what we feel. Because in the end, its all crap. [/edit]

Forget about my last post. It was wierd.

Anyway, had a free in the morning. I came to school with my sis, so I was pretty bored for like 15minutes. Attempted to read Hating Alison Ashley.. but wasnt successful. Nearly feel asleep too. So when Suely came, I tried to sabotage her D&T work thing and only managed to pull the string out of the needle. jks jks. I'm a nice person. I helped her do it! Wasn't I good Suely??? yes i know! Well, Suely didn't want me to turn her nice masterpiece into an excellent masterpiece so i decided to muck around with her nail polish (which was bright pink). I painted Aina's nails. And tried to paint Suely's hands. I mean hands not nails. So yeh, got my mind off things. Thanks Suely's nail polish. Oh mai, I painted your nails too. looks sexy.

Had assembly. Boring shit... Ellis is a wierdo. It's almost predictable that she'll tell us off at the end of each assembly after the 'official party' leaves. And I enjoy listening to her tell us off. wierd stuff

frustrated

I did so bad in my half yearlies. Might as well drop out now cause there's no point continuing year 12. I'll just embarass myself.

I need to express my feelings at the moment. But I dont know how. It's building up inside of me, and I dont know if I can take it anymore........

Happy mothers Day! I must say, I made the best card for my mum this year. It's so pretty. Simple, but still pretty. My mum said it looked like a wedding invitation. hehe Yeh, it was a fluke. I'm not artistic and creative. ahhaa I didn't get anything for my mum since I can't go out and buy it. So my sis and I are paying to get her hair cut and dyed and shit. She wants to perm it or something. Make it wavy or something. Have no idea. But my sis and I are paying. My mum wanted to get her hair done ages ago, like get it dyed and all, but it was too expensive. hahaha So now we're paying. damn. But still good!

Bloody spent and hour making my mum's card and watching tv. I gotta start doing my homework.... BUT I DON'T KNOW WHAT MY 4U HW IS!!! Far out. I should write it clearer in my diary next time. I'm so dead

BTW my eyelashes are better now. I mean my eyes. I plucked all my eyelashes. PROBLEM SOLVED! ahhahah yeh, feels much better.

itchy eye

I swear my stupid eye kills soo bad! grrr... I hate my stupid eyelashes, they're friggin poking into my eye balls and its killing my eye! Far out, my right eye looks all red and swollen now. I can feel the eyelashes swiping my eye balls. Is swiping a word? haha yes, i can feel them scracthing my eye balls. omg gay.

Why am I bloggin about my eye balls. lol. I have nothing else to say. Just bored at the moment. oh damn.. I should go off now, my right eye is leaking. Why the fuck is it leaking. *scratches eye balls*

[edit] mai's lil blog deleted :] hehehe. uuhh.. i blogged myself. rofls [/edit]

fate

Well, as you all know, well not many but I'm in love with the movie/book, The Notebook!! It's the maddest love story ever. I love it! I read the whole book yesterday and I've never read a novel in one day before hehe.

ooosh I just wrote a paragraph about the book and fate and stuff and decided to delete it. lol. It's the stuff I think about and I don't feel I should post it, since I don't know who reads this blog and I rather keep it to myself and maybe share it with those who I'm comfortable with. haha

OKAY! omg William you dumbo. You spent two days, reciting and renacting Russel Peteers comdey show and I think that "chop some bong" is like engraved in my head now, cause I keep thinking about the asian accent and omg. haha *anthony by day and chop some bong by night* lol. oh baby oh baby say my name.... hahaha

damn I wish I was going on an excursion tomorrow. damn hahah. oh wells I have a phys excursion in two weeks. No bloody point... Far out i only have like two periods in that day. pfft





!XOBILE

completely focused.

I am utterly, 100% and completely focused on HSC now. err.... YEH RIGHT! Well, I'm planning to be focused on HSC. My half yearlies have been totally horrible. It's like, the more exams i get back, the worse I do. Damn, 4unit. What a piece of crap. pfft.

Anyways, I've decided to focus on school and stuff for the next 6months. It's going to be hard, and I doubt I'll even succeed. But it's worth trying. But it's still good to have fun in a while *winks* hehe. yeh true, but might as well sacrifice it since 6months isn't that long and after that I can paaarrrty!! yay. I'm planning to get my P's and err drive. lol. I'm determined to get my P's now.

okay, time to go and finish off some hw. lol. I shouldn't even be on.